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To the mom who does it all without asking for help even though you’re breaking down inside… I see you.

To The Mom Who Does It All Without Asking For Help Even Though You’re Breaking Down Inside... I See You. - Pregnancy - 2023

To the mom who does it all without asking for help even though you’re breaking down inside… I see you.

Being a mom is hard. Your job is taking care of other people and making sure that everybody else is doing okay. We get so caught up in that role of helping others that we forget that we need somebody to help us too.

Because of mom shaming and Internet bullies, we also have the added pressure of pleasing everybody. We have to look strong. We have to look put together. We have to look the part. But that’s so far from reality.

Motherhood is a beautiful mess. It’s okay to not have it all together. It’s okay that your house is a disaster. It’s okay that you’re late wherever you go because it takes an hour to get in the car. It’s okay that you’re hair is grown out and has been in a bun for three days. It’s okay that you live in leggings and your husbands tee shirt. And ITS OKAY TO ASK FOR HELP!

You don’t have to be superwoman. Ask your partner to wake up at night sometimes. Call a friend to bring you dinner. Let your mom babysit. Just ask for help. There’s no shame in it.

It takes a village to raise kids so use your village.

Do you ever feel like it’s all on you? Do you have trouble asking for help? Do you have people around you who are willing to help? @aj_kellss (Instagram)

Originally posted 2021-01-11 10:54:15.

18 Comments

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  1. It’s absolutely not easier to do it all ourselves, we’re just convinced that our way is the best way, or the only way that we cut ourselves off from help because the process or end result won’t be the way we would have done it or wanted it. Having help is a game changer but we have to be willing to receive it.

  2. I get it, but I’m a control freak too. As a mom with little ones, I had to run everything, plan everything, be everything. Now our kids are in college and I see the toll that thinking took on me. Young moms, give yourself the gift of being in the moment and enjoy the days with them. Play. Rest. Laugh. Find a hobby — even if it takes up only one hour a week. Don’t let motherhood be your ‘only’. Let your kids see you ask for help and then give thanks for it — even if it isn’t done exactly to your standards. Let them see you apologize to others when you make mistakes. They learn so much from watching you. These lessons are part of what you teach them too. You’re doing great.

  3. It’s a double edged sword isn’t it. You want help but it’s easier to just do it yourself, you want support but to be left tf alone, you want to be kind to yourself but you have no time alone. It’s a funny journey isn’t it. But worth it

  4. I feel like this everyday. I have an 8 month old & she is our first baby… with everything that’s happened this year with the covid thing, I’m too scared to ask for help & feel like I just need to do it all by myself… even when my husband forces me to go have some me time “downtime”, I’m constantly thinking I should be with our baby & doing everything…. I’m exhausted & I feel so lonely…. I can’t believe I just admitted this.

  5. Agreed, I have a routine and it makes life so much easier for all of us. When others are helping, it all goes out the window 😂 a mess.

  6. 💯 sometimes it take more energy to explain and direct someone else on how to care for your baby. However, we all need help taking care of a baby because of how demanding it is. We have to get comfortable asking for help when we need it.

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Written by Claire

Claire is our Community Manager here at New Moms Forum. A mom of two (almost grown-up babies), Claire has been building and operating community-based websites for almost 20 years. In her downtime, Claire enjoys spending time with her family and drinking copious amounts of red wine!

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