Pregnancy Guilt

Tagged: ,

  • Pregnancy Guilt

    Baby Bumps - 2021 AcceptableCup6008 updated 3 weeks ago 2 Members · 2 Posts
  • Baby Bumps - 2021

    misserin99

    Member
    November 7, 2021 at 8:04 am

    I think that’s normal and ok to feel. We had friends ask us “how did you do it? We’ve been trying for awhile and no luck” and it felt shitty to say “idk we just had sex like 5 days in a row around my ovulation day and got lucky our first month trying.”

  • Baby Bumps - 2021

    futuremkat

    Member
    November 7, 2021 at 8:04 am

    I think it’s a common feeling, even with a planned pregnancy. I do think it’s a bit of a boundaries issue though — like where we sometimes “take on” responsibility for the feelings of others, where those feelings are actually theirs. Then we end up carrying guilt etc that burdens us when we do not need to.

    For example, it makes sense not to complain or joke or brag about your unplanned pregnancy to those women who are struggling. Totally. It makes sense to be sensitive to their needs with what you share, how, and when. But that’s very different from feeling like you somehow don’t deserve or haven’t “earned” a child, or like you’ve done something wrong, just by having a body that is doing human body things.

    If you’re moreso just worried that you’ll somehow trigger other women, I think there are probably tons of great advice threads on what to do/say and what to avoid, and once you’ve told them you’re pregnant, I think an honest conversation with them about what they need is not a bad idea. (Assuming these people are close to you.) Because everyone is different.

    That said, feelings just happen. It’s okay to have this guilt. It’s just not helping you, and it won’t help them either. But you don’t need to feel guilty for feeling guilty, either!

  • Baby Bumps - 2021

    AcceptableCup6008

    Member
    November 7, 2021 at 8:04 am

    TW: I sound insensitive but I am being genuine. If talking about issues becoming pregnant upset you please just skip this one.

    ​

    Does anyone have any advice with dealing with guilt around becoming pregnant.

    I am 11+5 weeks currently and it was completely unplanned, I was even on BC thats how unplanned it was. I am keeping the baby but it wasn’t something I was trying to do until at least 4-5 years down the road. Because of that I have a lot of guilt over the fact that I was able to get pregnant when I didn’t want to and there are so many people who really want to be parents but cannot. I personally know so many woman going through IVF and having a hard time and it all feels very unfair. I want to be sensitive to it but its hard when I don’t always know what will make someone feel upset.

    ​

    I know I cannot control who can and cannot get pregnant but I still feel incredibly guilty, Is that normal?

Viewing 1 - 3 of 3 replies

Original Post
0 of 0 posts June 2018
Now