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Forums Forums Group Forums Breaking Moms Husband kicked me and our children out. Reply To: Husband kicked me and our children out.

  • Hohenlory-

    October 19, 2021 at 2:43 am

    This makes me absolutely sick. I know there are a lot of injustices in our world today but goddamn this one needs more attention. Being a stay at home parent is such a vulnerable position to be in and is also completely dependent on the decisions of the breadwinner. My husband had pulled this once before, however, I made him leave. Long story short: the episode did not come out of nowhere and it will never happen again. It was both a breaking point and a turning point. Stick to the facts and only the facts when communicating with him and when processing the events in your head. I would bet money there is something else going on in his world that he isn’t emotionally mature enough to process alone or be able to communicate to you. Enter hissy fit about dishes, laundry, etc… things that can be fixed easily. Man child.
    If you do feel this salvageable, I highly suggest doing a pen and paper task list. Hear me out, our therapist suggested this and it works to this day. When you are both in a good head space, you (not him) make a list of every single thing that needs to be done: loading dishwasher, unloading dishwasher, packing lunches, making dr appointments for kids, paying sport dues, sending grandma a birthday card, vacuuming, etc. you get the point. Then you sit down together and divide the tasks up on paper (I used two different color highlighters). Once you both agree, you both sign it and post it up. This exercise alone helped show my husband what all is on my plate that he didn’t even realize I was taking care of. The items that are on his list are his, not yours, not ever. If he choses dishes and then doesn’t do them… then that’s on him. My husband and I decided that we would be ok with hiring help, as long as we took care of the arrangements. For example, he chose yard work as his task but hired a lawn maintenance man. Now had I, MYSELF, previously suggested hiring a lawn guy… it probably wouldn’t have happened.
    Anyways- I’m sorry this is happening to you. You deserve better.