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  • ausomemama666

    October 25, 2021 at 3:02 am

    My mom is emotionally draining. She behaved a little better when my first was born because I drew boundaries and was like “if you’re going to act like this then I’m not bringing your grandkid over.” But she’s done so many things, she renegaded on babysitting so I lost my full time position. She backed out right before I gave birth and I couldn’t find a replacement option. She babysat once a week, to every other week, to only on special occasions, and I’m just like “well since I’m broke now we don’t have special occasions soooo thanks.” But this is very much on level with my parents. They make promises and act reliable but when they realize helping others doesn’t always directly benefit them or they don’t end up with the better deal, they lose interest.

    My kiddo turned out to have autism. My mom tried to convince me I was wrong despite my own brother being autistic. She offered to put my daughter on her insurance for her very expensive therapy and I pay the deductible and extra premium. Then when I took her up on it she backed out. I ended up cashing out my life savings and 401k to get private insurance for her. We were about to buy a house.

    She repeatedly will say “if you need anything, anything at all then tell me. Except money.” Well, my daughter’s insurance company won’t take 4T clothes in exchange for her $13k insurance deductible so no thank you. I don’t need an excessive amount of dresses or pairs of shoes for my daughter. She gets tons of toys at therapy. I buy what we need second hand. Or she could babysit so I could work more, but nope. She doesn’t like that I buy second hand because my dad makes really good money.

    My mom kept getting drunk and saying stupid shit. Most recently I mentioned needing to buy a new filter for my water faucet. She asked me, “why do you make yourself suffer like that?” She wouldn’t clarify. I assume I’m either making myself suffer by not buying bottled or because I won’t buy my landlord a fancy fridge with a water dispenser and ice crusher in the door?

    Currently, her and my dad have been inviting us over and failing to mention they had a party with unvaccinated people. They failed to mention my brother who lives at home wasn’t vaccinated. I had mentioned how dangerous covid is to pregnant women and they got vaccinated but didn’t encourage my brother to go get his. He’s high functioning but he’s autistic, they have absolutely failed at raising him, and since our older brother is incredibly selfish I know my brother will be living with us when our parents die.

    Right now they’re refusing the covid booster shot?

    They said they’d watch my daughter when I go into labor and then because I wasn’t spending Thanksgiving or Christmas with them because of covid and it’s so close to my due date, they decided theyre going 7 hours away for Christmas. And “oh we’ll drive back as soon as you’re in labor.”

    They absolutely suck. They’ve also tried to tie us down to their town and trying to dissuade my husband from getting a higher education. My dad swore he could get him a job making $50k, then $40k, then 32k… Or my husband could keep waiting tables! Then they said he should just commute an hour to class and live in a house they buy but we pay the mortgage, taxes, and fees.
    They want us to live there despite the schools not being great for autistic kids and my mom swore she’d baby sit this time!